Tomorrow, I will switch off my computer, unplug the mass of tangled wires next to our bed and walk away from 17 years of working in the law into a great unknown.
I thought I could be that woman who ‘had it all’ – the law job, the three young kids, our own home. I thought she was who I wanted to be, would always be. Six years ago, I even wrote about it in this newspaper: “My husband and I have found our own unique version of ‘it all’ … It doesn’t mean that we have everything, but that we have a balance of what is important to us”.
But COVID-19 has been a disruptor. Worldwide, it has changed our cities, our lives, our sense of certainty for what tomorrow will bring. It is a year that has left scars. Tonight, my little girl stood at the head of the table, eager to read out her grade one reflection, “This year has been bad,” she began.
It was a year that began for me with eight long days at the Royal Melbourne Hospital with sepsis and severe pneumonia, with my husband trying to get home from Vietnam, with my children scared without us. I emerged back into a world from which I craved certainty, trying to shrug off the deep sense of my own mortality that had settled. Instead, a pandemic swept the world. And our foundations shook further.